You have heard it said

So a new idea I have is that instead of saying "God loves me," I could think "God has a variety of feelings towards me." I think theologians figured out a long time ago that all those feelings would be some form of love if I am right with him through Christ, but it could be beneficial in some way to entertain a thought that there first of all could be a range in how happy he is with my behavior at any given time, and that he invented time for a reason that involves his participation as well.  So people say God can see everything at one time and forgives me anyway, but if I am supposed to do things like count the clock during history class or grow up or try to do what I am supposed to throughout a day that includes responsibilities involving other days, then I could spend some of that time guessing that God might have a complex emotional reaction perpetually matching my status in creation at any given time so that he is literally not wasting "time." As in, he is not wasting the concept and creation of time that he invented possibly as a facilitation not at all of something linear or one dimensional or even glowing blob-like circular but to cause variety that would then include his own perception of all his people.  And if it takes a lot of people to entertain him in just the right way, maybe it takes a lot of interesting things about each person and their life like maybe even bad and good for all the complete reactions to happen. Like God does not want to be bored, so sometimes he is mad, happy, and sad instead of just doing miracles all the time. To me it would help if there was something in the Bible to back that up like if there were stories of him doing things like being a carpenter or something.  Then we would know not to just tell people God loves them when really we are supposed to say something like "I wonder if the way you just juggled pies and then threw one in someone's face reminds God of the time that he invented dinosaurs."  That is probably how poetry got started unless the Bible says something different like if it said "In the beginning God was speechless." It actually says the opposite which is very interesting because it did seem kind of quiet and dark early on, not in an agnostic or atheistic kind of way but more like a roaring vacuum which is interesting to think about like instead of an explosion moving outward, God calling things from outward towards him and everything appearing from nowhere in the opposite direction.  Think about it and it could correct another idea of it to land in some middle ground that matches the Genesis account that I actually think has more clues about existence than people realize.  But I think the science happens all over the Bible so people can't cheat and zoom in to the part they think has the technology breakthrough they are looking for.  I myself think there is a hidden parenting manual across all the books of the Bible where God is three years old during the time of Noah, twelve years old when David says the battle belongs to the Lord, a teenager in Ezekiel, a young adult getting married in the gospels, a middle aged person in the letters of Paul, and then 70 years old in the book of Revelation which actually descibes him as having white hair and bronze feet.  Like that is kind of weird like a Florida retirement kind of thing, not to criticize anyone but if you see it like that you probably could find some cures for some diseases too, or a good recipe for fish, or the story of western civilization.

The Pope's recent leadership

Ok, everyone, the pope just said some crazy stuff about not blessing gay marriage and I don't want to ruin anything but I will say that I think he has sufficiently cracked the code that gay marriages can in fact be blessed by God and not just that but caused by God, and the pope is doing something from Jesus's teaching where you hide your righteousness so as not to be praised by humans.  I almost can't stand the intensity of that kind of sacrifice knowing the popularity and media celebration he could have had, but I will go ahead and mess up his plan a little by saying that I think a lot of people have figured out that there could be more variety to marriage that everyone realized for a while. And the gender variants that forced us to discover this don't have to be celebrated or despised or denied.  I personally believe that marriage is usually designed as a gendered thing as opposed to friendship, and that is the very reason that gay marriage has to happen for some people, because their gender really is bent so to have a gendered relationship means being in something that seems like a "same sex" union to other people.  But that is how they attained the gendered union because they really did feel more like the opposite gender.  Is that really so complicated?  For me it is, and becomes a constant source of torment when a whole society weighs in on it all.  But some of the people who opted to give up religion due to societal foibles ended up truthful and free and won't lose that reward from God.  And I think the pope knows it and supports people in a good way and I think his little reputation sacrifice is a bit much when he and Pope Benedict to me are already the best popes ever!! Way to go fellas! A faithful pope for the Catholics and a secret nonpope for the Protestants! It's genius!  So who does that leave for the Orthodox? I would say Oprah but it's not my choice. Well that is all everyone, have a great day!

Hugging Feet

Ok, this blog post is more simple than some of the other posts and it has to do with the tradition of "footwashing" in the bible, usually associated with serving others because of the scene where Jesus washes his disciples feet and tells them that to be great you must be a servant.  But I just want to share a little theory which is that I think there is something else about it that could really help people if they saw it, and I think it has to do with a love so great that people felt like kneeling at each other's feet, like bowing almost in a way that you can't do because it is so near to worship.  And washing feet was the way to do that without crossing that line.  I say that not based on biblical scholarship and anyone who has a problem with that can wash their own feet in the bathtub.  But I say it from feeling a few times with just a number of people that if I saw them I would hug their feet because of what they did for me.  It is often people like teachers, but not always, and ironically it is a love so great that I am mostly safe from turning it into some kind of idolatry. It is really something to think about not just in terms of when and why to do things like feet washing ceremonies, but to think of how to facilitate or promote that kind of love in your life or other people's lives.  I think in our culture sometimes it has happened outside the church in workplaces or other social experiences where people can know each other that well and do something for each other that causes that kind of adoration. Anyway it is just something to keep in mind and I think it is a rare thing that shouldn't turn into a paranoia of suspecting there is not enough love to go around.  The fact is that Jesus's life was a miracle so he had that kind of love almost all the time. Do you make that the goal or does it come from working with others for more specific goals? I do not know. I think God tells us to feed the poor and do justice for people not just for their sake but for us to have meaning and purpose that causes love. That is all I will say about it except that contrary to some feelings, it could be that more groveling is needed and not less for many people.

Whose photo is on your driver's license?

Well everyone, how are you doing. This is a normal worldly monk post like most of my old ones.  And it is about the common teaching for people that their identity is "in Christ."  And I just want to say that I think that as people try to use their gifts and help others, then some of their identity actually might be found in a more multi-faceted quality of who they are as they participate in life. So while it is good to not base things too much on other people's perceptions or success that can be taken away, if people keep seeking some undefinable thing called "identity" in God or "Christ," who in the end, is really his own self, then they might miss out on some ways of being that could have ironically been more beneficial in the long run. In fact, the more I have done the best I could in any way, the more I find that idea to be a cheap religious teaching that doesn't make that much sense, when so many people could be happier and fulfilled by investing in things that really bring them to life in a good way and cause a great harvest of almost anything. Are people saying that quote as a response to identity politics and racism? I think that a more actualizing achievement-based strategy could help with that too.  People say, this is why you have lost everything in your life and God knows you held secret selfish ambitions.  But I know that is not true and that most people have no idea what they mean when they tell everyone their identity is "in Christ" except to say please stop doing things well because at church our veiled message every time is that we are better than you.

video of practice talk for a youth group

 Hey everyone here is a link to a practice talk I gave for a church youth group about poetry and mental illness/depression:

https://www.facebook.com/Refriedbeanpoet/videos/459686251897589